Courageous Living: Interview with Alex Kendrick

Godly men.

Are they really that hard to come by?

Courageous men.

Are they out there?

Yes.

And they are striving to make a difference, like Alex Kendrick, who co-wrote, with his brother Stephen, the screenplay for  Courageous — a movie challenging men to rise up as fathers and husbands, but doesn’t shy away from sending a powerful message for moms and wives to answer the courageous call.

In addition to directing Courageous, Alex also played a the leading role of Adam, a father and police officer struggling to balance the commitments of work and balancing his family, until an unexpected tragedy wrecked ho-hum normal and forced an about face on priorities and life purpose for Adm .

In honor of the debut of the  Courageous DVD, released on January 17th, Alex Kendrick set aside a few moments to share with me his heart for not only this film, but for a movement of courageous fatherhood (and motherhood) to sweep across our culture.  I encourage you to take a few minutes to consider these matters of the heart and a wealth of wisdom from Alex, which I’ve done my best to capture for you:

Make the Commitment: Click the image to bring up a printable version to hang on your fridge!

Lisa:  Although  Courageous offered a challenge particularly to men to step up in their roles as fathers and husbands, I found myself — as a woman and mom — equally challenged.  One scene, in particular, left a lasting mark on my life.  My heart broke when Adam, whom you played, refused to get out of the car to dance with his daughter.  That scene touched me on two levels.  At the time, I was estranged with my father and could feel deeply the pain in the daughter’s heart at being rejected by her dad.  On another level, I saw myself as mom and the too-many-times-to-count that I’ve put off a dance with my own children.  Later in the movie, Adam returned to the dance scene location and finally “had that dance” with his daughter, which by the way left me a blubbering mess.  I couldn’t take the pain, but it made me vow to live life differently!  I went home, typed up “I’ll have that dance!” and hung it on my fridge.  But living it out each day is still a challenge.  I suspect I am not alone.  I’d love for you to speak to that reality.  In particular,  what would you say to moms and dads struggling with guilt over what they haven’t done with their children?

Alex: As the father of six children, I know how easy it is to not focus on the right things and miss golden opportunities.  A father seeking his own approval, it is easy to be distracted and consumed by work, and  neglect the emotional needs of his children.  We conducted quite a bit of research in preparation for this film, which revealed that a child who feels loved and approved of by their parents grows up into a secure and confident adult.  But a child who misses the love, attention, and affirmation of their father or mother spends a lifetime searching for significance.  This is why it is so important to get the message to dads to invest time in their kids.  For parents facing guilt over what they haven’t done for their children, I would urge them to surrender the grief to the Lord.  They need to emotionally let go of the past and allow themselves to begin again. The reality is that God designed for fathers (and mothers) to fill a role in a child’s life.  And when we don’t do it God’s way, there are consequences and pain.  On the other hand, when we do it God’s way, there is great blessing. It is never too late.

Lisa:  And what practical word of encouragement might you offer to the mom or dad seeking to be intentional with their children, today?

Alex: This is really the heart of Courageous.  As the Scriptures describe, we want to see fathers turning their hearts toward their children (Malachi 4:6).  It starts with deciding today who you will serve (Joshua 24:15).  Too many dads are abdicating their roles as fathers.  That is where the opening scene of Courageous is really a metaphor for courageous fatherhood.   Will dads take the wheel?  We are passionate about seeing men get back into their roles as fathers and husbands, being willing to fight for their families, protect their children, and invest in their lives.

Lisa:  As someone involved in mentoring the next generation, I would appreciate you speaking directly to the young woman or man who is presently living life with an emotionally, or even physically, absent parent, or who is struggling with the rejection of a parent?

Alex:  God promises to be the Father of the Fatherless (Psalm 10:14, Psalm 68:5, Psalm 146:9).  And God gives the fatherless extra grace.  Yes, the absence of a father is painful [or mother] is painful, but it is not your fault.  The Lord will never leave you.  He wants to be your Father and provider.  Run straight to Scripture.  Run to God.  He will step in where others have left off.  Truly, turn to the Lord and let Him fill your holes.   The fatherless need our love, but no one can fill the holes.  Only God. Only He can do that.

Lisa:  It has been more than 10 years since Sherwood Baptist Church brought you on staff as their Media Minister, and Senior Pastor Michael Catt offered you the opportunity to make movies designed to reach into the culture.  The journey began with Flywheel followed by Facing the Giants and FireproofI would love for you to share with us how you’ve remained focused on this vision God put on your heart?

Alex:  It has really been like the story from Scripture when Jesus calls to Peter to walk on water (Matthew 14).  Peter wonders if it is really possible.  And of course, he faced his fair share of fears when he faced the storm.   Producing these films have been like that, with moments of shear terror and fear, wondering what people will think of them.  Will they be too cheesy?  Have we handled the Scriptures well?  Can we even do this?  It has caused us to seek God’s favor most of all.  Our first priority is prayer and seeking Him.  If this is God’s purposes for us, then we follow Him where-ever he will take us.

Lisa: And I’d also love to know how you’ve balanced family life with ministry and career?

Alex:  Oh, that is so hard.  It has stretched our family, because it is so incredibly time consuming.  It is not only the production of the film but the traveling, speaking, editing.  It isn’t a 9 to 5 job!  I’ve learned that I need to fill the love tank of my wife and kids.  My wife says it is like my version of having a baby — a real blessing, but also challenging.  It definitely leaves stretch marks!  So, we praise the Lord for any fruit and yet guard myself carefully.  I need to refill through time with the Lord so that I can be restored spiritually and emotionally.  That’s really why we only produce a film every other year, to give that space for restoration.

Lisa:  So, everyone wants to know, is there a new project the plate?

Alex:  Currently, we’ve released two books based of Courageous, The Resolution for Men and The Resolution for Women.  We are also working on another new book, The Love Dare for Parents.  As far as another film, we are in the praying through the plot stage, for filming in another year.  But really, we are waiting on the Lord as we’ve learned to never jump ahead of Him!
Lisa:  The films you have co-written and directed have had a tremendous impact on my family, providing Biblical truth within the context of life application.   Time and time again, we quote lines from Facing the Giants as we seek to instill Biblical decision-making and values into our family.  Fireproof provided the foundation for my maid-of-honor toast at my sister’s wedding, as I used the illustration of the salt and pepper shaker to challenge my sister and husband to stick together.  Now, with  Courageous available on DVD, I am excited to add one more film to our movie library.  It is our grown-up Biblical admonishment to live a courageous life!  Thank you, Alex, for taking the time to share with us about  Courageous and the message this film so accurately captures.  I know I speak for many: we are so incredibly grateful for your part in the ministry of Sherwood Baptist Church and Provident Films.  Your movies have changed our families for better.  We pray for you and ask God’s richest blessing on your endeavors.

Alex:  It has been my honor.  I only hope that  Courageous will impact lives further with the release of the DVD.

To learn more about Courageous, visit the website.

It is not to late to enter the Giveaway for Courageous DVD here!

Leave a comment below sharing your thoughts about this interview, and you’ll get a bonus entry!

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