How to Get Out of the Comparison Trap

How do you do all that you do?

Is there anything you ever leave undone?

Do you ever sit down?

Is your life always so put together?

Are these the types of comments and questions you receive from friends and strangers alike? Do you feel this way about your best friend or mom, your Bible study leader or next door neighbor?

Why is it that from our vantage point, everyone else seems to be doing so much better than us?

It’s called the comparison cycle, and it is deadly. The enemy whispers, “You’re not good enough,” and without us even recognizing his tactics, he steals our joy and robs us of contentment (John 10:10).

[clickToTweet tweet=”Satan paralyzes us with defeat through a comparison game of should have, could haves, would haves. ” quote=”Satan paralyzes us with defeat through a comparison game of should have, could haves, would haves. “]

The more we seek the Lord for discerning what our days should look like, the less it will matter what everyone else accomplishes. In turn, the more joy we will have in what we spend our time doing each day. We have to refuse to listen to that condemning voice hurling accusations our way as we ask for God to guide us in how we spend our time.

In everything she does well, she is most certainly is leaving something else undone.


How to Get Out of the Comparison Trap

As I type this, I have dishes in the sink, laundry to move to the dryer, more clean laundry to put away, and a tub that ought to be scrubbed. Please, sisters, don’t go look. It is not the standard by which I would ideally live, but it is the compromise. It is the life-in-grace with an eternal perspective focus shaped by our family values.

We do what we feel is most important, and that means something will always be left undone. 

We depart from what we say is important to us as when we’re distracted by other commitments or responsibilities. While we say we want one thing, in reality, we spend our time elsewhere. But why? In some case, it is simply a matter of time management and self-discipline. At other times, we might be reflecting an inherited hang-up, false thinking, fear-based issues, or a basic lack of training.

Taking time to evaluate what we believe and why we believe it can be the start of living life with joy while avoiding the comparison trap.

Our thinking dictates our choices, and so when we’re not happy with our choices it is time to consider what’s fueling our actions.

  • Am I listening to the opinions of others?
  • Am I keeping a standard that I don’t believe it?
  • Am I seeking approval?
  • Am I avoiding conflict?
  • Am I avoiding criticism?
  • Am I trying to be someone else?
  • Am I doing what I was taught without considering it’s relevance today?
  • Am I trying to make myself feel better through accomplishing a certain task?

We have to evaluate our motives and standards to make sure they are right before the Lord and fitting for this season in life. And then we need to be willing to change.

Just because it once was, doesn’t mean it’s a habit that’s right for this season in life or a routine that matches your current calling. 

Rather than trying to live out someone else’s life or what once was, why not embrace what God has for you today? By doing so, you can learn to live more in God’s grace and less in condemnation.

Fighting the comparison trap will lead to finding satisfaction in the here and now.

Isn’t that a better way to live?

Would you like help in getting out of the comparison trap?

Life coaching offers a short-term investment with a long-term gain in the battle of comparison and pursuit of contentment. Use the contact form below to set up your free consultation appointment to discuss how life coaching can help you.

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