When it Feels Like God is NoWhere

If you would have told me twenty years ago that I would one day find myself in a weekly dance class again, I wouldn’t have believed you. Back then, I was still grieving and fussing over the way my knee injuries disrupted my dreams and stole my passions.

When I thought God was NOwhere, He was actually NOWhere. - Elisa Pulliam

My mom enrolled me in my first dance class when I was three and by the time I was 10, I was fitted for my first pointe shoes. Although tap and jazz were more my thing, those pointe shoes represented so much potential until a series of knee dislocations and a failed surgery ended my dream of becoming a Rockette. I buried my sorrow as I went on living my “Plan B” life, until that night when I had another freak dislocation while gallivanting around Paris during a rendezvous weekend while studying abroad in London. I lay on that cold, foreign, isolated x-ray table, screaming at God for the first time, ultimately believing He was the cosmic killjoy of the universe. The “It’s not fair!” tape played over and over again in my head as I had to make the trip back from Paris to London and hobble around on crutches, missing classes and having to forgo a hiking trip to Wales.

Have you ever felt like God has been more about the business of re-routing your life rather than ordering it? Do you feel like there is a roadblock at every turn? That just when things are getting good, something else happens . . . and it looks like God is no where in sight?

When I thought God was NOwhere, He was actually NOWhere.

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