Moving Out From Overlooked

I really didn’t want to go alone.

It isn’t that I couldn’t do it.  Of course I can be alone.  And even be happy.   To be honest, I love my quiet, lonely days spread out with the freedom to think and pray and reflect uninterrupted.

But I hate to be alone in a crowd. 

Hate it, I tell you.  Just hate it.

Yet no matter how much I hate the pain of loneliness in a sea of warm bodies, being alone was my fate. I sucked in a breath of strength from the One I know delivers on His promises, and pressed into the morning routine.  And then it dawned on me that my oldest would be my companion and I really wouldn’t be all alone.  New hope lasted only a moment, however, chased away by her booming voice informing me of an unwelcomed reality.

“Mom, I’m not going with you today.  They need me to cover in nursery.”

“What?” I barked.  “Why?”

Her explanation made no sense. I stomped away frustrated, completely unable to fix this predicament.

Why is that always the case?

Why must we be  forced to face the uncomfortable when we feel least able to handle it?

***

Dressed and confessed up, I put a mask of duty on my face and headed out the door, grumbling to the Lord about the plans He must have in store for me.

Lord, I really don’t want to hear what you would have to say to me today.  I’d much rather weep tears alone at home.  I don’t think I can stand to express a lick of emotion in such a public place, only to have no one notice.  God, why do I have to be alone. here. today?

I rushed up the stairs, commitment in hand, only to find no one to receive it.  Really, now, I balked!  How could the tech student be absent?  Didn’t he know the whole reason I was even there was to hand deliver the computer, since my husband…who should be sitting next to me…was home sick.   I sank into my seat, half cocked to escape before anyone noticed.  It was too late.  Others made their way to the balcony.  But.  They.  Didn’t. Notice. Me.  Or did they, assuming I’d be joined by my family.  They all turned away.  Away from me.

I opened the bulletin, falling into rank.

Are you kidding me, God?

A sermon on loneliness, while I sit here all alone.

But before I had time to argue, worshiping voices urged me to the cross.

He Knows My Name.

Seriously, Lord!

I don’t really want to know about you knowing me right now.  I simply want to be seen by those over there.

But you do know my name.

***

Yes, seriously, my friends.  God not only knows me, but He saw me, too.  He even saw the two women arrive late, flutter into the seats next to mine, and then shift to the other side as soon as the song ended.  This was a comedy of errors with me in the center of the joke. But God will use even the outrageous situation to get our attention.  See, He gets us.  He gets me! He knows the secret tears stashed in my heart.  He gets you, and knows your daily struggles, too.  He plans to meet us in that broken place and give a message of hope found in Him and His truth.

It isn’t like God suddenly appeared on my Sunday morning, ready to teach me a new lesson about moving out from overlooked.  Not at all.  He’s been watching me my whole life and knows exactly how much I struggle with feeling not only lonely, but more devastatingly overlooked.

He knows how I felt rejected when I was always the third of a childhood best friend group.

He knows how you feel rejected, too.

He knows how often I feel out of joint with those who are supposed to love me unconditionally.

He knows when you feel misplaced and misunderstood, too.

He knows how my place in my community is neither here nor there, without a title that means much to many.

He knows your place, exactly.

He know how it hurts to never be noticed when an absence is ongoing.

He know it hurts to be forgotten.

He knows how often I struggle with likes and stats and mentions and tweets.

He knows your struggle for significance, too.

God get us.  He knows more than our name.  He knows our story.  He knows our secrets.  He knows our needs.  He knows.  He knows when we feel overlooked.  Forgotten.  Unnecessary.  Without purpose.

God desperately wants us to move out of overlooked and into a life of significance.  He wants us to dwell fully in a place of knowing whose we are found in the cross and wallpapered by His truth.  It is a mindset, girlfriends of every age!  Are you willing to move out from overlooked with me and into finding our significance?

 

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{linking up with Write It GirlTop Ten Tuesdays, Better Mom}

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Elisa

Founder & Director at More to Be
Elisa is a trained biblical life coach, mentor, and speaker passionate about equipping women to experience authentic life change for the sake impacting the next generation. She is the founder of More to Be and author of Impact My Life: Biblical Mentoring Simplified. Elisa is also a life coach and coach instructor dedicated to helping women discover how God has equipped them for today. She considers her first calling as wife to Stephen and mother to her house-full of children. Her favorite days begin on the porch with the Lord and end on the beach with her family and friends. Connect with Elisa at www.elisapulliam.com.
11 Comments
  1. Love this Elisa!

    “God get us. He knows more than our name. He knows our story.”

    God does get us! He knows us! What great hope we have in a God that knows us! Thanks so much for sharing today!

    • Thanks, Ashley, for stopping by and sharing words of encouragement with me today! Blessings on you!

  2. Yes, I need to move out from the overlooked. I related to most of what you wrote. Thank you for writing it. I just moved to a new town back in August of last year with my family…so loneliness has been an incredible struggle. But I have seen God working in it and I know it has its place. Thank you for the link too!

    • Dionne, there is nothing like a move to make you feel completely alone. Lord Jesus, I pray you’d bring new friends into Dionne’s life and connect her once again to people who love you and her in the flesh!

  3. You touched my heart. I read these words and just this week had the same thoughts. He knows me. How amazing is this? We forget so easily that his plan should be ours…that the interruptions and changes are for the good and we will overcome. Thank you for your words today as you made me feel that I am not alone and others feel some of the same thoughts as I do.

    • Thanks, Karen, for letting me know I’m not the only one who feels this way at times, and for sharing how the Lord used this to encourage you. To God be the glory!

  4. oh thank you, thank you for this. i’ve been wrestling with the Lord in the area of my expectations {of others} lately, & along that wrestling journey, every single time i hear the words, “He knows . . . ” it soothes my aching soul. He DOES know, doesn’t He?! thank you for the gift of your transparency. i just discovered the link-up at write it, girl, & i’m so very glad i did . . .

    blessings to you & yours,
    tanya

    • Tanya, I am so glad you stopped by and shared your thoughts. Links up are such a great way to get to know others. I’ll pop over your way now!

  5. I believe you speak for many women with this post. We are so prone to judge, to assume that everyone else has friends, is more popular than us, etc, but that is rarely the case.

    I love how the sermons often speak to just what I need, don’t you? They are especially convicting on days such as you describe, when you really would rather not be there. :-)

    I was painfully shy as a youngster and in high school and have worked to overcome that behavior. The benefits of stepping out are wonderful but scary as well: what if they don’t like or accept me? What if I am a terrible social doofus in public? I have been, and it hasn’t killed me yet and has managed to sharpen me.

    I think it still beats hiding in the corner, having spent way too long there!

  6. Don’t you just love when sometimes it seems like he is practically screaming at you. It happens to me often.
    FYI I hate being alone in crowds as well. :(

  7. Oh, I think you and I could swap some stories…can’t count how many times God has spoken through someone or a sermon to reach me…oh, but aren’t we glad that he knows our struggles and loves us like that? The past few years I have been experiencing great victory in the area of seeking significance outside of the Lord. May the Lord bless you for your honesty and help you to find courage to be alone in the crowd. It does feel awkward to be alone in a crowd!

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