How do you know if a friendship is healthy or on the brink of dysfunction? And how do you know when to put up boundaries, and what exactly those boundaries should look like?
Wouldn’t you agree that as moms, these are questions we face not only in our own friendships but also as we help our children navigate their peer relationships?
How do we love like Jesus but also care for our hearts well?
It ain’t easy, sister! I’ve had my own challenges in discerning when it is the right time to pull back or push into a friendship that takes a turn in a challenging direction. And with my older girls, we walked through a really heart-wrenching friendships challenge. The girls that hurt my daughters happened to be the daughters of my dearest friends. I didn’t want to advise my girls to throw the friendships away, but at the same time, there were deep wounded that needed time to heal and wisdom for how to rebuild, if that was ever going to be a possibility. It was a mess I couldn’t figure out on my own and even the counsel I sought were uncertain about the best next step. In one quiet morning, while praying and pursuing God for a solution, He gave me the most practical vision for how to move through friendship challenges.
It’s what I’ve come to call the “house approach.” Yes, a house. And I’ve used this house analogy not only with my girls but also for myself and with my son as well as with a gazillion teens I’ve mentored and oh . . . my . . . word . . . I’ve seen God bring about such beautiful healing and restoration in so many relationships.
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