Many times I’ve looked at other women and thought, “Why doesn’t my family look like hers?” I admire her house, her car, her incredibly talented children, or her husband’s high profile job. I’m tempted to wonder, “If I’d made different choices, would my life be better?”
It’s easy to look at the people we know and assume they have it all together or to envy another family’s path.
God has a unique purpose and mission for our family.
By focusing on the lives of others, we discount our life, our family, and our story, and we become discontent and unhappy. And if we’re not careful, our children will pick up on attitudes and behaviors that undermine their sense of belonging. We also waste the power we have to create a thriving family culture in our home.
Don’t stay stuck in wondering how your life could be different.
Move towards the family God created you to be.
Choose to believe that you are fearfully and wonderfully made.
You are a child of God, and so are the members of your family. He knew what He was doing when He created you, but also when He put you together.
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
Whether you feel better or worse about yourself after the comparison, it rarely leads to humility, which pleases God. Not only that, comparison robs you of joy and the energy that could otherwise be used to serve your family.
Intentionally appreciate what you have and who you are. An excellent practice is to read scriptures on thanksgiving. In a journal, write down 2-3 things that you are grateful for and want to nurture in your family. Also, appreciate and cheer for the people you love.
Recognize the value of God’s plotline in your life.
What unique gifts and talents has he given you, your husband, and children? How can you work together to serve God and your community?
As you do these things, you can embrace your story and break away from what’s holding you back from becoming the family you were meant to be.
Then, with insights from the Holy Spirit, you can establish your family’s particular set of values and decide what you want to be known for! After that, you’ll be able to take small steps towards developing a strong family culture. You will be able to lead with purpose and passion. Your children will build confidence and purpose that will equip them to follow their personal mission and embrace their story and who God has created them to be.
This path does not lead to a perfect life but rather a life marked by contentment and purpose that will impact future generations.